one foot infront of the other, you can't stop me now.

Who am I fooling, really? The ones who know me, love me - know this is not right. They know I'm not right. I walk around defending my actions, pleading for a clean slate. I want it to all disappear and fade to black so that I can just move forward. Always moving forward, forgetting yesterday and hoping for better tomorrow. Where am I when the day ends? In the pit of blackness I have create for myself, begging forgiveness.. begging for a light of some kind. I am waiting for this person who doesn't exist - and I am still surprised when he doesn't come around. Made a fool. So whose to say I am not entitled? Let me fade to the blackness. After all of this time, always getting the worst of the people who get the best of me - I'm defeated. I welcome the pain, because somewhere inside of me I believe I must have done something to deserve this.. at some point in the elusive 'time' of life I have done something awful to render all of this pain. So I will sit back, watch the flames - and wait it out. Pack up my bags, wipe away the tears and dirt and pain... and keep moving forward.