I wanna go down every road you've been

I want so badly to feel like it is all coming together. I want to hold on tight, and not let go - feel secure in our plans and ventures and believe that it will all pan out. Negatively I stand here feeling like it will all fall apart, and nothing will go as planned. I guess it's just what Im used to.. but even as I type that I can hear you saying "sure it's what your used to, but it's not what you know now... so stop it." and your right, I know that. It's almost like I subconsciously cling on to the tragedy, and can't believe that anything could possibly work out for me. Then my bipolar kicks in, and I'm looking into the future - seeing everything in a positive light. It's amazing to me you've stuck around, asked me to marry you, and want to do this for the rest of our lives. I'm a bloody yoyo, and I can never make up my mind. It's a wonder anyone puts up with me, actually.... but you in particular, amaze me. So much to take on, and yet you do it with such grace. You never seem to loose sight in whats important, and you have a way of helping me see the beauty of whats to come, and what is. That, with so many other reasons, is why I know that marrying you is whats right. We love you, very much - thank you for guiding me through the desert.