I claim to say what's on my mind - and eventually, I do. It just doesn't seem to be as instantaneous as it used to be... I find I'm holding on to things, that needn't be held on to. It's very odd - because this feeling of relief, once Ive gotten something off my chest is euphoria... but even knowing how that feels I still find I carry unnecessary weight loads. I'm not sure what the root of that is, but when I figure it out I will let you know.
As for my physical well-being? it's been better. I am with another head cold, I think that will be the third so far in 2010 (and look at that, it's ONLY March 24th... love it.) WORST. IMMUNITY. SYSTEM. EVERRRRRRR. I'd just like to be healthy for a couple of weeks in a row - I know that's asking a lot... but that's the kind of girl I am, I guess.
Actually, speaking of asking for things - that's something I suck at. I HATE asking people, for anything. and if I must, I beat around the bush so long that they are offering before I even have to say the word. THATS the kind of girl i really am - completely useless when it comes to asking. I'm good at telling, just not good at asking. I hate favors, I hate owing... bleh. GIVING? giving I can do... it's my life, giving, providing, completing. It's what I live and breathe and know all about ... sooo giving = check. telling = check. asking = epic fail. *sigh* I will figure it out one day, maybe. I'm sure life will eventually force me to do it - I'm just sitting in the back seat waiting. I'll oblige, when it does eventually come to kick my ass - but for now, I will sit in the back seat and pick my nose and scratch my ass, and continue giving (boogers and swass, perhaps?) and wait until life FORCES me to ask.
It's really only 10:41pm right now - which saddens me to NO end. I feel like it's 2am, but my body.. does it want to go to sleep? negatory. Hence this completely useless post - Im hoping to exhaust myself by typing, and re-reading and fixing errors (hahaha... fixing errors... I dont fix NOTHIN... automatic spell-check does that FOR me!) See, I don't even have to ask - it just does. Laziest generation, ever. I swear, we are all sitting in said back seat... fingers up our arses, waiting.
"somehow you'll escape all that waiting and staying - you'll find the bright places where boom bands are playing...." I would continue to quote Dr. Seuss, but I fear I'll loose your interest... for those of you still continuing to read this completely useless rant - Dr. Seuss is a genius though, for those of you who don't already know this. I highly recommend "Oh, the places you'll go!" and "The Lorax" - both, excellent books.
You know what I really hate? medicine labels that read "tastes better than ever!" Fuck you Nyquil - you still taste like SHIT. better than ever my ass - YUCK! It's like taking a shot of cherry flavored vodka... oh yes PLEASE.. this tastes GREAT, give me MORE. Its going to induce sleep shortly though, which is really my only goal at the moment... seeing as Im sick, and exhausted.. and sick.
I wish I could boycott everyone for a week - just not have to interact with any other humans, for an entire 7 days. I think I'd come out of it feeling fucking excellent. Like top notch, brand spanking new. It'll never happen, but I can dream. THIS is why people recommend against having babies at 17 years of age - for SANITY RESTORATION. or lack thereof. Okay, I'm done now.. and going to sleep. Good night, and good morning, and afternoon too.
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