by now you should have some how realized what you've got to do.

I close my eyes, I hold my cheek next to your skin - and breath you in. There is nothing quite like the smell of your skin, nothing that makes me feel safer. We are bound to fall, fail, quit, get up, dust off - and begin again. Life is too messy for anything to ever be simple - life is to good to ever stop trying. It took me some time to understand what I was doing here, and some days I'm still not sure. With all odds stacked against us, I think we've done pretty good for ourselves. I wonder if it will ever be clear - if we'll ever be able to sail smoothly without tidal waves and rocky waters. I wonder if it would even matter? Maybe that's just part of the glue that keeps us holding... maybe it's just the way it's supposed to go. I can feel the intensity of the ever changing life we lead - it holds me tight, leaves me gasping for air. It's not the first though, and it's not the last either. I know that it has no barring on what we can accomplish. I can't help feeling like I've repeated these words so many times over, phrased a little differently because my mind was working on a different angle. Maybe it's a testament, a reminder to myself of what is real... what is pure and whole. It reminds me not to forget where we came from, where we are and where we are going. It reminds me not to forget how it's shaped us, and how it will continually change us. It reminds me of the ever changing, ever strong love and commitment - it reminds me of the me who you've helped me to discover.